Hear Ye There Ye! Be it known throughout the lands Faire that the Fallen God known as Alia Baroque stands this day accused of a list of offenses so long that it makes the Silmarillion seem positively zippy!
Ergo and to wit, thusly and whatnot, the Faireland Sheriffs do accuse the…..well, the accused of the offenses below. which are by far the worst of the worst of the – well you get it. They’re BAD!
Firstly: Interfering with VERY OFFICIAL Pawlice business. Note that we use ALL CAPS. That is how official we are talking!
Mr. Baroque on Monday the 25th of April created a scene of complete chaos by turning a perfectly lovely Jailing of another Faireland scoundrel into some kind of weird Jail house disco scene! I mean, really! Where was the justice in any of that???
Secondly: Inciting Extreme Chaffing. Have you been to Golden Delta on a windy day? Some of us wear jodhpurs and other items that easily trap sand in places not even the Lindens have looked!
Finally, and perhaps MOST serious of all, is it just us or is he WAY too nice for a Fallen God! We demand an alignment penalty of minus four on saving throws versus huggies and snugglez. Yes! Both!
We iz de law. We haz spoken!
The Faireland Sheriffs Association
The Jailing of Alia Baroque will take place 1-3 PM in The Golden Delta. Choose his fate and receive the Blessing of Isis or Anubis in the form of exclusive unique incarnation of a skin that is available only during this event.